It’s not ME, it’s YOU! 🥴 A Sample Escort Ad with Sample “Client” Responses - a case study in the fundamentals

Oct 29
12 min read

Let’s take a quick look at a sample ad I currently have posted online and then example a sample of text message responses to my ad - it’s stupid. 🤣 ENJOY

Next post: what real clients are, how real clients behave, what types of experiences do clients book, plus more juicy details to inspire your next date!

Side Bar Post: why the term “client” is meaningless in 2025, plus a brief overview of the evolution of John-terminology

Have a question or topic suggestion? E-mail me at Heather@HeatherRileyXO.com if it’s a fit for my blog, my Substack, or my medium publications - I’ll tackle whatever industry-related curiosities you want to know! (Fun storytimes posted to TikTok.)

Heather Riley

Why 10+ Years Experience as a Fulltime Escort Matters:

intuition from experience. An expert's "gut instincts" are not magical; they come from years of applied knowledge and pattern recognition.

institutional knowledge. Beyond formal training, i have absorbed the unspoken wisdom of the industry. This institutional knowledge—including best practices, what pitfalls to avoid, and which strategies work—is an intellectual asset that provides a competitive edge & value that cannot be ignored.

immediate value. My deep understanding means I can hit the ground running with minimal ramp-up time. I don't need extensive training on the industry's fundamentals, allowing me to focus on high-impact issues that matter.

The last Cinderella story from the board-era. Sharing, explaining, exploring, and discussing important cultural traditions, history, people, and our stories is a privilege, an honor, and personal passion.

Title: Beautiful Sexy Heather Riley GFE Ranked #1 DT 😈 OUTCALL

Ad:

READ TO END TO MEET ME!

The sexiest playmate in Chicago Heather Riley is available to please you tease you and drive you crazy with my soft curvy sexy body, perfect big voluptuous fake tits, big 43" ass to grab eat and sit on your face, a sultry sinful killer smile, hands all over you, me Pressed up against you Until your animalistic urge takes over and you have your way with me... I’M A LOT OF FUN TO F*CK!!

no calls, text only, no questions, no chitchat, read all links below, men, women, couples, duos, 420 friendly, ready when you are babe - my location doesn't matter im coming to you!

OUTCALLS HEATHER RILEY AVAILABLE TONIGHT, FOR RESPECTFUL GENTLEMEN 300+ Positive Reviews & Counting, Newbie Friendly, Virginity Friendly, & more!

No explicit talking, No questions, no chitchat. Please be concise and direct with your booking request and screening information in one-message! No games. I'm VERY REAL. Serious inquiries only. (QVs cost the same as HR, no car dates) DFK, BBBJ, GFE, PSE, Fetish, Kink, FEMDOM, Findom, Filming, XXX Pornstar, VIP, ATF, SugarBaby open to arrangements!

TEXT NOW: 816-456-3688EMAIL: Heather@HeatherRileyXO.com

"Hi Miss Heather Riley, My name is ____. I saw your ad on _______ and would like to book you tonight in _____. I saw your rates on Tryst, I visited your Links, & I'm ready to spend some time with you this evening. Looking forward to hearing back from you!" FILL IN DETAILS

Heather Riley available anywhere in Chicagoland for respectful gentleman looking to spend time with a beautiful, sexy, Charismatic, High energy, & Looking to please you in every way. Loves to kiss! Outfit request allowed. It's Lingiere & Trench Coat Season!

Heather Riley - The Perfect Mix of GFE + PSE 😈Squirter, Throat Goat, BDMS Switch for afternoon quickies, dinner dates, overnights & FMTY for men, women, couples! Read all my links below.

NO "you available" "hi" "you free" "location" "donations" texts - be direct and concise with your booking request in 1 message (I'll ignore you!)

text to book, no calls, be respectful: (816) 456-3688

If you want to just talk, I offer (1) sexting/FaceTime packages (2) VIP Onlyfans (3) Premium Snapchat

Booking Oct to Dec 2025 - Available for respectful clients looking to have fun with a pretty girl at your place, my Incall by prebook, or out for a night on the town! Booking by Texts or email, no calls or DMs. I'm incredibly friendly, sweet, playful, and a guaranteed great time (AS LONG AS YOU FOLLOW THE RULES) and I look forward to meeting you!

INCALL weekly west suburbs m-f 8a-2p. Prebook incall in advance highly encouraged to secure your desired time with me, or go ahead and try for asame day requests (if schedule permits!) *incall by prebook only

INCALL in Rosement hotel once a month by prebook only! 3pm-12am, 1-2 hour dates available, late night with paid deposit, extention available

INCALL Outside of posted hours? No problem! I'm happy get us a hotel room & add the cost of the room on top of my fee! Or you can get us a room. Easy & nothing to worry about.

Sybaris - 4 hour afternoon sessions or overnight sessions! I love all the naughty hotels. Let's visit them all. (Did you know there was more than one naughty adult hotel?!)

Holiday Party Guest Bookings for the holidays - Available for respectful clients looking to have fun with a pretty girl tonight a work event, Family get together, and Dinners with friends. I will be the perfect companion & girlfriend for the evening to enjoy comfortably during the holidays. Turns out the best part about the holidays is the gift of Heather Riley! (Holiday Event & Party dates are no rush, full evening.)

RANKED #1 Deep Throat on USASG

Links:

My Site: HeatherRileyXO.com

My Links Page: TheRileyEffect.com

Verify Me: Preferred411.com/P273586

My Rates: Tryst.link/escort/therileyeffect

My Content: OnlyFans.com/theRileyEffect

Snap: Snapchat.com/add/missriley.chi

Twitter: X.com/theGentlemansXO

#TheRileyEffect • Ranked #1 Deep Throat on USASG • 300+ Positive Reviews • EXPEN$IVE WORTH IT

pictures included in ad:

average inquiry to ad:

Ron

Mike

Schedule Checker

AJ

My “Text only, no calls.”

Auto Response

AYE BAYBAY!

More Information

“I know, bitch.”

“Is that a maybe?”

“Up to you.”

Hi Heather

Ryan

BE DIRECT WITH

BOOKING INFORMATION

“Would really like to see you,

don’t know what to say”

Justin

As you can see, I do not get anywhere in the booking process whatsoever with these types of inquiries - even though my ad itself is meticulously structured for potential clients benefit. I don’t care if you’re rich or poor, young or old, black or white - I will always say yes to a genuine inquiry! At this point, I should know better, but I’m an optimist who always believe in the best of people. So when given the benefit of the doubt and a second chance to be respectful, approach correctly, still have the opportunity to book a date with me - it goes nowhere 100% of the time. That’s why we don’t engage with text or emails that do not include everything in the first message. I gave it a shot anyway! Silly girl…

I went viral on TikTok for explaining how there is only one way to interact, approach, and book a sex worker. I Explained in the video that it is done in one or two messages. Regardless of any of the instructions posted specifically & repetitively in the ad, nearly every single person who messaged me clearly did not read the ad. They saw my photos and just thought I was “hot.” Its truly bizarre that somebody genuinely wants to meet me is so mean nasty and argumentative instead of simply reading the ad and following directions. 100% of these inquiries are: Timewaster, fantasy bookers, carrot danglers, pic collectors, and location collectors.

My ad is heavy with “NO” lists, resources, & templates to make booking a date with me as soon as possible. I hate not focused on how fun and awesome I am. Overtime it’s been edited out and replaced with expressed instructions. (You know… if people are just clicking contact because they see how hot I am, maybe I should just get rid of pictures! Lololololol A lot of girls get rid of their phone number in ads, maybe I’ll remove my photos instead?!)

It seems to me that not a single person reads any of it all! (Not even the title - why are you asking me for Incall when the title says outcall?? Why are you asking me any questions at all? Everything is literally in the ad - if something’s not there, you can Google it!) Even when I can get them to use the template, they quite literally copy and paste it into a text message without filling it out the specific details. Happens all the time on Tryst, too.

It is not by accident that my contact information is nestled directly in the middle of the ad - readers are required to see the first important block of text in order to access my contact information. Readers are fully aware that there is a paragraph of information to read above & before my contact info - it’s unavoidable. And yet I am flooded with this mess? 🤨

The silliest thing about it is that I love working. I absolutely love saying YES to as many people as possible. I love long, gorgeous, wonderful dates in Chicago and incredible FMTY travel companion sidekick adventures - I even love scheduling a fully booked hotel outcall (at my usual place). Men are typically incredibly wonderful respectful excited, supportive, and they always bring a gift, a bottle of champagne, and put the fee in a well written, thoughtful card or a book they wanted me to have and occasionally inside of the brand new high-end designer wallet or card holder. It doesn’t matter if they’re booking 4 to 6 hour dates of regularly or one hour dates whenever I host in Rosemont - clients are always on their best behavior, excited to have fun, easy to book, fun to be around, leave a tip, and continue interacting with you on social media and showing support with tips and wishlists!

Funny thing - having sex has an escort, a professional girlfriend, a highend hooker, selling intimate experiences to strangers, becoming an adult content creator and then a porn star, for over 10 years I have been a hypersexual woman ready, excited, enthusiastic to fuck at a moments notice…. I’ve learned to keep my legs crossed & shut?! For over a decade, Men have traveled all over the world to fuck me and play with me because I am incredible enjoyable multi orgasmic beautiful woman who loves to please. It’s just a fucking blast! You’ll wanna do everything with me, I’ll encourage you to live your best life.

That’s the Riley effect. Selectively slutty. Reserving the best of me for the best of you! The incredible value of Quality over Quantity. In a world where you only have one chance to make a first impression, go hard and knock it out of the park! Give me an offer I can’t refuse, big daddy… or get blocked & blacklisted.

Keeping my legs closed is why I just got back from Utah for a FMTY private switch fetish session - I have no problem rejecting unqualified applicants.

I would love to accept and book everyone of the hundreds of people who message me, that’s the goal. Who doesn’t wanna be booked and busy? But if people cannot be bothered to read a basic ad - I see no reason to be bothered to respond. In what world will these inquiries ever turn into actual dates? I want to say yes yes! Unfortunately, I say no and move on. That sucks. However, It’s an incredibly important business skill to be able to recognize a dead lead as soon as possible. A lot of these punks respond “lol” because they think it’s funny, clearly indicative of never being real clients in the first place, but I don’t think there’s anything funny about it at all. It confirms I was correct about them being Timewaster in the first place. It’s just that I love booking dates - in fact as my job to say yes! I should not be saying no to anyone. It’s stupid.

These are not the clients looking to book with a beautiful girl now or in the future. Typically, they are not even “clients” by any measure. There will be no dinner dates, no going to events or fun places, no overnights, no gifts, no support or encouragement whatsoever. It’s exhausting and draining immediately. They always have the audacity to say why or what did I do wrong - they literally did everything wrong and not a single thing right?! Ooh boys, Don’t drain me emotionally, I want to drain you & your wallet! Don’t make me feel exhausted trying to get the simplest information out of you in order to schedule a potential date - the only exhaustion I wanna feel is after an overnight fucking me for hours. Guys love to watch me cumming my brains out. I’m so sweet and so cute and then suddenly - holy shit! Im coming everywhere. When I start squirting, the entire room is a splash zone. And I always want more! I’m a full body and soul experience. A lady in the streets, Wet & Wild XXX in the sheets!

“This” pitiful list is not how “clients” behave. It’s also not how providers behave. According to conversation across the internet, most providers from the street to online only openly talk about ignoring these types of Many of these men used as examples have all been blacklisted for several years with reports of the same terrible behavior over and over again. These men continue to send these messages endlessly for years, knowing it never works. I try to address it head on by including client guides and message templates. Isn’t that nice of me?

My guys don’t do this shit. The guys from the backpage didn’t do this shit. You’ve already read the blog post What Do Clients Say About Heather Riley. I think you guys might enjoy another blog post about what real clients, what my guys, what the minimum standard of expectations are for potential new client or as a sweet fun, gentle reminder down memory lane for friends and familiar faces. Be inspired!

I really like fucking clients who are excited to see me! Especially in this lifestyle, client who book me are expected and are usually very happy to be generous, thoughtful, supportive, encouraging - I have always said from the very beginning: clients make dreams come true!

So many people on Reddit say that talking to these guys a little bit and doing a little bit of hand holding usually helps out and result in a great date with someone who extends and tips! Bullshit. That’s not true. First time clients have no problem following instructions, doing research, and booking successful wonderful dates on the first try. It’s always from repeat offenders. Even with all of this hand holding, it did no good.

Hoe Code 101 - No Free Emotional Labor!

None of these inquiries are ever going to be a client that makes dreams come true. Typically guys are incredibly wonderful and sweet when they first reach out, then they continue to book me for multiple years. It’s true intimacy. It’s an incredible experience. It’s personal to me. I’m honored and privileged to be a positive influence and source of happiness in someone else’s life. I have a gift of bringing out the best in people. No incredible love story ever started with the words “U Avail?”

As for texts like these? I think I’ll keep my legs crossed until someone worth my time gives me a reason to smile. I would have no problem booking everyone except for the fact that everyone seems to be a problem. Immediate red flag after a red flag when I am trying to find a reason to say yes! Who knew that selling pu$$y would teach me to keep my legs closed instead of open for business 24/7? People call us “whores” but I was definitely far more accessible to fuck before I was a sex worker.

I said it very clearly in one of my text messages: you don’t act like a man trying to get laid.

As someone who is an online spaces, I’m fully aware that this trash behavior is everywhere. (I’ve said it before - we had an influx of the sugar babies ruining the industry, but we also had an influx of new potential clients who also have no business being in the industry!) I am also aware, even in my own city from tour girls, that there are plenty of gentlemen in the hobby who know how to book dates, are actively booking fun dates with girls every day of the week all year long, and love following and interacting with beautiful girls all the time! I have personally spent a decade with the best of the best.

While I am aware these ridiculous inquiries are just bullshit, I also know it’s everywhere - who the fuck taught these idiots?? I created a spreadsheet of easily accessible, free, 100% reliable links to a variety of blogs websites and resources for clients to read and educate themselves to maximize and have the best experiences in the hobby possible. I list 1 Client Guide on my links page called “New Client Homework.” Clients are told endlessly to do their research - you are required to research the industry itself before ever reaching out to a “provider.” The messaging is pretty consistent throughout everything I’ve read. I do not know how so many people came to the conclusion that they could speak to or actually book an escort with any of the messages above. Nothing on the Internet says to do that. It doesn’t even matter what my ad says, let alone the Internet - this widespread subsection of men is absolutely helpless.

I will continue to have the same standard and expectation as a professional companion and of the generosity and excellence from potential & current clients!

I will spend some more time looking for additional links to add to my spreadsheet and then I will publish the spreads for your darling client benefit.

I like to make these posts for educational and entertainment purposes. I have a great sense of humor. I hope you have fun and learn, too!

I’m an incredibly beautiful girl immediately available to give you the blowjob of your life - what could be better?! oh wait we never even get that far before I block them. I can tell by the first message if it’s a real client inquiry or if it’s a Timewaster. It is a night & day difference between real client and a Timewaster. They have absolutely zero idea how to book a date. And I’m the easiest girl to book!

I loooove dates! I wanna be fucked from sunrise to sundown, respectfully. Guys love talking about how crazy and wild sex is with me. I blush but I like it too. (The girl next door is a FREAK!)